When my dear sweet son was born I was ecstatic. Deeply in love with this tiny little baby. Albeit, exhausted and grumpy from lack of sleep but completely and utterly filled with joy! It was not long after that my heart began to desire another of those little crying balls of joy. I thought it would be easy, after all my first little guy was a surprise! If you ever read my blog you know my story and you know it was not an easy time after all. In fact, this blog has chronicled some of my many ups and downs, my struggles with keeping faith and keeping hold of my emotions when it seemed like there was no end to this difficult journey. Today, I am so thrilled to write this post to say we have finally received our miracle from our Heavenly Father!! It has taken just about eight years to get to this point. The day I found out I was just shocked and really filled with unbelief that this could be true. It still feels like a dream! Let me share a brief summary of the story with you (you are more than welcome to go back and read prior posts to really get the full emotions of it all).
As I said, I began to desire a baby soon after our little one was born but it wasn't until 2008 that I realized something was wrong and we just were not getting pregnant. After going to a Reproductive Endocrinologist, I found out I had PCOS and that I would likely not conceive without some kind of medical intervention. Soon after I switched to a regular OB-GYN because I did not care for the RE I had met. My new doctor prescribed me Metformin, Progesterone and Clomid to start trying to become pregnant. After the first cycle of Clomid I really felt a strong call from God that this was not what He wanted us to do. At that point, I decided no more Clomid and just Metformin and Progesterone. A couple of years went by and still nothing was happening. At this point we decided to try and do foster care but that plan fell through as it apparently was not God's plan for us either (side note: I still feel very much called to do foster care but I am trusting in God's timing to open up those doors). It was a very depressing time for me as we decided to put those plans on hold and at my next yearly check-up with the ob-gyn I decided to go back on Clomid again. This time we made it two cycles before I chose to listen to God calling us away from this path. This was in August 2012 and at this time a recurrent message kept appearing in my life: "Be still." I would open my bible to a passage that would contain that message, a song would come on the radio, someone would post on Facebook. It was just so clear to me that God was calling me to be still and wait upon Him. I stopped all my fertility medication and thanks to a dear friend changed my eating habits drastically. Then, only two weeks after changing my eating habits I ovulated! I was so excited because no medication had ever done that for me! So ten days later I decided to take a pregnancy test because of the urging from this same friend and that afternoon I stood in the bathroom staring at 2 lines. It brings tears to my eyes just to think about that day.
All of this to say, that God is so faithful. He will always care for His children and has a plan for each one of us. I don't know why I had to wait so long but I know that God knew better than me. I've learned so much through this trial and strengthened in many areas of my life. I know that God also has a plan and a purpose for this little baby and the timing for this child to enter the world could not have been more perfect according to His plan. Thank you to everyone who has prayed for us and continues to pray for us!